The Social Dilemma: How technology is affecting our lives.
The “Social Dilemma” is a docufilm on Netflix, created by Jeff Orlowski. “The Social Dilemma explores how addiction and privacy breaches are features and not bugs, of social media platforms.” The documentary features scenarios of how technology, and specifically social media, is affecting people and their lives, as well as includes interviews of a few people who helped build social media and now fear the effects of their creation on users’ mental well-being.
As a parent of a 15 year old, I thought the documentary was really interesting and it highlighted how vigilant I need to be when it comes to my son’s introduction to, and use of, social media. I have always thought it was important to be open and honest with my son to help him learn how the world is and what to expect as he continues to grow up. Social media can be so deceiving because people don’t typically share the hard, difficult parts of their life. For example, take a simple family photo shoot. What you see on social media is the beautiful professional photography, showing a loving family smiling and laughing together, looking beautiful with hair done, make up on and new outfits. What you don’t see is the toddler melting down because the photo shoot is during nap time, or the husband who is frustrated and didn’t want to do the session in the first place, or the mom who just wants everyone to shut up and smile. Social media only shows the good stuff. For our younger generations growing up on social media and always seeing the beautiful, smiling, perfectly filtered people means they are living with unrealistic expectations. They aren’t seeing the real side of life. The more time they are on their phones, living in the world of social media, means the more they are being faced with the lies that are put on social media.
There is a scene in “The Social Dilemma” where a family is discussing the use of their phones, and mom gives them a challenge of locking their phones up for dinner. The son hears a text ding and wants to “just see who it is”, the youngest daughter breaks into the box almost immediately because she can’t stand not having her phone. These behaviors then prompt the oldest sister and mom to challenge the son to not touch his phone for one week. Ultimately he ends up failing because he just can’t take the not knowing of what is happening on social media.
As the film describes, these social media apps are not designed with safety and security in mind. They aren’t created with a thought of “how can we keep kids using this app safe.” They are created with wanting to be the best app, get the most followers, etc. Before social media, if someone didn’t like an outfit we were wearing, maybe they told their friends, they talked behind are backs, or they kept it to themselves. We aren’t meant to know what everyone’s thoughts are about us. Social media has given a platform to speak our minds without thinking or caring about the repercussions. I often think about my niece, who is 15, blonde hair, blue eyes, tan and athletic, and I worry about her use of social media. Don’t get me wrong, her parents are just as strict and aware as I am. But I also know how savage teenage girls can be, and social media gives this anonymity so people think it’s ok to say terrible things. I wonder how the things seen on social media affects my niece as a young girl. Does she realize that Khloe Kardashian’s pictures have multiple filters applied and are photoshopped? Does she know that just because someone has their hair done, make up applied, and looks like they are having fun, they could be absolutely miserable? Social media allows people to give a distorted view of their lives, and allows them to portray their thoughts on how others are living their lives. Like the young sister when she posts a picture of herself, there were many positive comments, but one negative comment about her ears is what affected her the most. The film discusses this and highlights the “statistics on depression, anxiety, and even suicide rates of teenagers that correlate with the rise of social media.”
I don’t think watching the film will necessarily make tons of people say goodbye to social media. But what I do think it should do is remind people, especially parents, that technology can have a negative affect on our lives. There should be conversations about use of technology and social media as a part of parenting. We must discuss with our children about things they may see on social media, and how to appropriately use their phones in general. For example, I recently had to remind my son that his grandparents, my parents, won’t always be around. Sad I know, but it’s true. I told him that it is important to be in the moment, to appreciate the time with his grandparents. When we went on a recent trip with his friend, I warned him that he was not to be on his phone the whole time, and instead should be enjoying the time with his friend. I think this is what “The Social Dilemma” should be doing for us. We need to remember that our lives are NOT in our phones. While technology is a growing part of life, we can still have a healthy relationship with it instead of letting it take over. In order to do so, we need to set boundaries on the use of technology and social media to let us have fun with it, but also know that it is not always true reality. Our lives are what is in the physical world around us. We need to speak to each other, look each other in the eyes, enjoy the view of the world around us.
Resources:
7 Best Documentaries Like The Social Dilemma You Must See
What Is The Social Dilemma: 6 Things To Know About The Netflix Documentary Before You Watch
The ‘Social Dilemma’ has a message: Put the phone down and listen up
